


I lose my head, I lose my spine

by LinneaKou



Series: strange beasts (Hopeless Wanderer) [2]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Animal Transformation, Anxiety, Baleful Polymorph Katsuki Yuuri, Curses, Dogs, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Magical Realism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-06
Updated: 2017-10-06
Packaged: 2019-01-09 14:28:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12278436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LinneaKou/pseuds/LinneaKou
Summary: Yuuri and Viktor go to the Cup of China, but Yuuri's curse still lingers.





	I lose my head, I lose my spine

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Anniversary! It's been one year since _Yuri!!! On Ice_ first started airing and honestly, even if I hadn't started watching right at the premiere, I'm still glad I joined this fandom. Thank you, YOI team, for saving 2016 and 2017 for me.
> 
> ETA: thank you to Gab for the beta!!

Yuuri’s reappearance takes the skating world by storm. Viktor’s presence as his coach only fans the flames. So of course, all eyes are on them both at the Cup of China, after Yuuri breezes through the Japanese qualifiers. Upon their arrival in Beijing, the first thing Yuuri does is reunite with his former rinkmate and coach.

Phichit Chulanont has been in contact with Yuuri for months, calling him as soon as the news broke that Yuuri had returned to his home, alive and well. Celestino had been the next person to reach out, and after Yuuri had reassured him that what had happened in Sochi was not his fault, they’d agreed to end the current coaching contract that was almost up anyway. In between the interviews, the SMS storm, Yuri Plisetsky’s sudden arrival in Hasetsu and the subsequent Onsen on Ice, Yuuri completes his degree online and finalizes his free skate.

Viktor finds himself having to adjust to his new role as coach quite quickly. It’s difficult, much more so than he’d originally thought. Yakov had offered no usable advice, so Viktor is left flying blind.

Coaching Yuuri is much more complicated than Viktor had ever imagined. Thanks to their strange, undefinable relationship that was constantly being redefined with every passing day, Viktor finds himself questioning his methods constantly. Yuuri’s technical skills are improving and shining through, and his presentation is benefitting from it.

Except for the night that Yuuri came home, and one more time where Viktor got the whole story out of him, they do not talk about the months between the previous year’s Grand Prix Finale and the day Yuuri returned home to his parents. No one else knows that Yuuri actually spent those months in St. Petersburg, having been unwillingly transformed into a toy poodle. They still aren’t quite sure of the technicalities, but there’s no point obsessing over it.

There _is_ the fact that Viktor had arrived in Hasetsu with two dogs instead of just Makkachin, who has thoroughly been enjoying her vacation in Japan. After a couple months, someone had mentioned to Viktor that Yukkachin probably wouldn’t be found at this rate. Viktor hadn’t been quite sure how to respond, but how does one explain the strange, surreal situation without appearing to lose their mind? In the end, Viktor had memorialized Yuuri’s poodle days with an Instagram post and stated that he was sure Yukkachin had found his way to a warm and loving home. Yuuri had blushed profusely and refused to talk about it.

In any case, they’ve arrived in China. After his hot-blooded proclamation at the press meeting, Yuuri finds himself answering inane questions about the power of love while Viktor bumps into Yakov and invites him out for hot pot. Yakov declines and then asks if Viktor _really_ thinks he knows what he’s doing.

Viktor doesn’t answer, but he does manage to rope Celestino and Phichit into the outing.

Phichit spends the entire meal carrying almost the whole conversation. It’s like he’s running on every drop of energy in the world, a complete 180 from Viktor’s encounter with him from Worlds. Yuuri had been elated to hear of his friend’s subsequent success on the rink, expressing the kind of pride that Viktor would have expected from a parent or sibling.

Of course, the evening devolves into drunken shenanigans. Yuuri refuses to partake, citing the next day’s competition, and Phichit happily documents it all. Viktor thinks it’s a pity, knowing what a party animal Yuuri can be after he’s got a few drinks in him, but Yuuri doesn’t push him off when he drapes himself over his skater so in his mind that’s a win.

The Cup of China is also the first time in months that he’s seeing Chris in-person, and while Chris dramatically teases him about how he’s lost all motivation to compete without his favorite rival, he still puts on a good show during the SP. All of the skaters do.

Still, when the day ends, Yuuri is left in the lead. And he seems to be the most shocked at this, even though Viktor knows damn well that Yuuri can take _Eros_ much further.

Yuuri spends the night tossing and turning. Viktor knows this because they’d chosen to share a room, and he’d had to listen to the noises of shifting covers for two hours before he was able to drift off.

The next morning, Viktor is only a little surprised to see that Yuuri’s bed is empty. He decides to go out in search of some good coffee and a nice but light breakfast before the open ice practice.

When he returns to the room, Yuuri still isn’t there. At least, that’s what he thinks until he notices a lump that he’d previously thought to be a pillow suddenly move.

Viktor can feel his face contorting into a half-horrified, half-hysterical expression as he throws back his skater’s covers to reveal… _Yukkachin._

“What?” he asks out loud, and the toy poodle gives a mournful howl.

 

“So let me get this straight,” Viktor says, clutching his flimsy cup of coffee as Yuuri hangs his head. “You were here the entire night. You fell asleep human and woke up a dog.”

Yuuri nods and it’s the weirdest thing Viktor has ever seen.

“You didn’t run into anyone. No teenage witches.”

Yuuri nods again.

“You didn’t encounter any strange magical amulets or anything?”

Yuuri gives him a hilariously indignant look and shakes his head, his furry ears flopping.

Viktor groans and pinches the bridge of his nose. “Well, we’ve got a few hours before we need to be anywhere. We can figure this out.” He notices that Yuuri is shaking, and kneels down so he’s at his skater’s eye level. “Yuuri, what’s wrong? Is this a poodle thing?”

Yuuri actually growls at him and turns his back on Viktor, shuffling up to the head of his bed and burrowing under the pillows.

Viktor blinks in confusion. “Yuuri?”

All he gets is a twitch of a fluffy tail and a loud huff.

“Yuuri, when’s the last time you went to the bathroom?”

That gets him a long whine.

Viktor sighs and slips his coat back on before he strides to Yuuri’s bed and throws the pillows aside. Yuuri yips at him in indignation before Viktor bundles him into his own long coat, grabs his room key, and heads into the hallway. “Quit struggling,” he mutters, “I’m not sure if this hotel allows dogs.”

Yuuri stills against Viktor’s chest, and Viktor can feel his cold nose on his collarbone.

They make it outside without any issues, and Viktor immediately sets Yuuri down on the sidewalk. “You’ll stay close to me, yes?”

Yuuri nods and sets off for a secluded spot where he can… ostensibly do his business. Viktor follows along at a respectable distance without getting too far, and when they reach a park where there are hardly any pedestrians, Yuuri stops.

Viktor stops as well and waits, but Yuuri doesn’t do anything. Eventually, he turns and looks over his shoulder at his coach.

“Oh,” Viktor says, turning on his heel. “Fine. Here’s some privacy. Not like I haven’t seen this before, you know.”

Yuuri whines at him, but Viktor can hear him doing his business and smothers a hysterical laugh at the absurdity of the moment.

_How is this my life?_

“Are you done?” he asks instead, and something brushes against his ankle. He looks down, and Yuuri stares right back up at him.

“Done?” he asks again, and Yuuri nods. “Nothing else?”

Yuuri shakes his head, and Viktor sighs.

“So what should I do for food? You think you can handle human food?”

Yuuri blinks and tilts his head, and Viktor takes that as a helpless shrug.

“I can probably find some canned food but it would feel weird feeding you dog food,” Viktor adds.

Yuuri sighs and starts walking back the way they’d come.

“Wait! Yuuri, wait up!”

They make it back to the hotel without any trouble, and Yuuri endures the return trip to their room inside Viktor’s coat. Once safely shut back in their room, he lets Viktor wipe his paws before curling up on the bed.

“Are you sulking?” Viktor asks, raising an eyebrow.

Yuuri gives him the most withering look that a dog can manage.

“Well, fine,” Viktor says, straightening. “I’ll go get some food for you. Eggs and meat okay?”

Yuuri makes a noise that Viktor takes as assent, and Viktor lets himself back out into the hallway so he can head downstairs to the restaurant.

He’s scooping bacon onto a plate when a familiar voice calls his name. He looks up to see Georgi sidling up to him, eying the plate with no little amount of want.

“It’s for me,” Viktor says quickly.

“Of course,” Georgi answers, tearing his eyes away. “Where’s Katsuki?”

“He’s resting.” And that’s technically true. “Preparing for the free skate.” Not so technically true.

“Well, if he skates like he did yesterday…” Georgi’s face contorts. “Never thought I’d see the day that you weren’t the one to beat.”

“Don’t be daft,” Yakov says, coming up from behind them. “Yesterday was pure luck.”

Viktor swallows. “No, it was all Yuuri.”

“Vitya. It’s fine to have faith in your skater, but I saw him after the interviews.” Yakov fixes him with a very flat stare. “He looked like a deer in headlights.”

Viktor opens his mouth to answer but is interrupted by the timely appearance of Phichit Chulanont.

“G’morning!” the Thai skater says cheerily. He opts for the responsible healthy meal of warm oatmeal with fruit and glances around. “Where’s Yuuri at?”

“Resting,” Viktor says automatically.

“I hope his nerves aren’t getting to him,” Phichit says, frowning.

Yakov snorts and walks away, and after a moment Georgi follows.

Viktor turns to Phichit, who is sneaking spoonfuls of sugar into his oatmeal. “I hadn’t noticed bad nerves,” he ventures, casually throwing another sausage link onto the pile and moving onto the eggs.

“What, at regionals? He was competing against teenagers,” Phichit points out. “You said it yourself, he could take it easy then.”

“And he… _did_ mention nerves,” Viktor wants to smack himself on the head. “Crap. I forgot.” Or, really, he hadn’t really thought it would be… _bad_.

“Just keep him from having a panic attack,” Phichit suggests. “Don’t let him get caught in his head. That’s pretty much the reason he fumbled the GPF in Sochi.”

“Igottago,” Viktor says in a rush, tossing a napkin over his plate and turning on his heel. He practically runs to the elevator, hopping from one foot to the other as he waits for it to arrive. He _does_ sprint back to his room door and fumbles for his room key.

Not shockingly, Yuuri has burrowed back under the pillows, letting out shrill noises when Viktor pulls him out.

“I brought food,” he says, hoping to cut through what he suspects to be an anxiety attack, and Yuuri just kind of shivers in his grasp. “Yuuri, you really should eat.”

He sets Yuuri down on the bed and picks up a sausage from the plate, dangling it in front of Yuuri’s nose. “Smell. Yummy, right?”

Yuuri stares at him, and then nudges Viktor’s hand away and jumps down to the floor.

“Yuuri?” Viktor says, confused, and then Yuuri begins to shove himself under his bed. Viktor yelps and catches him by the back legs. “Yuuri, you can’t avoid this!”

Yuuri whines, loudly, as Viktor drags him out.

“At least eat something?” Viktor sighs, holding the struggling skater-turned-poodle aloft.

Yuuri lets out another whine, kicking uselessly.

“I don’t want to drop you, stop wiggling!”

Yuuri goes limp, and Viktor instinctively brings him up into his chest. Yuuri makes a surprised little noise, but Viktor begins to stroke his back in a way that he’d probably never be allowed to get away with if Yuuri were human. “Listen,” Viktor says softly, and Yuuri falls silent. “Whatever’s happened, we can figure this out. You’ve broken this curse once before. You can do it again.”

Yuuri sighs and Viktor echoes him.

“Okay, enough moping.” He sets Yuuri down on the bed and grabs his tablet. “I bet we can do research or something. The internet has everything on it.”

Yuuri gives him a doubtful look, but Viktor still counts it as a win when Yuuri starts nibbling on a slice of bacon as Viktor unlocks the tablet and opens up a fresh web browser.

Viktor starts off with Google. Tapping on a promising link, he leans back on the bed as Yuuri rediscovers his appetite and demolishes the plate.

A few hours later, and the search has turned out to be utterly fruitless. Viktor’s eyes are starting to blur, the tablet is running low on battery, and Yuuri has curled up next to Viktor’s head. Viktor shifts and tries to change his grip on the tablet, but he drops it on his face with a dull _thud_. “Okay. Break time.”

Yuuri whines and buries his face in the bedspread.

“C’mon, you probably need to go outside again,” Viktor says, plugging the tablet in and rolling off the bed.

Yuuri stares at him in what can only be abject horror.

“Yuuri. I don’t care about what I may see. I don’t care that I’ll have to clean up after you. I _don’t care_. I just need you healthy.” Viktor grabs his coat, toes his shoes back on, and finds a serviceable plastic bag to stuff into his pocket.

Yuuri gets down from the bed and makes as if he’s going to follow Viktor, but then tries to crawl under Viktor’s bed.

Too bad Viktor’s already thought of that. He snatches Yuuri up by his middle and shoves him under his coat. “If you pee on me, it’s your own fault.”

Yuuri whines, but goes still once Viktor leaves the room again.

It’s now squarely mid-day, and the open practice has to have started. Viktor smothers his sense of urgency and slips out of the hotel so he can deposit Yuuri on the pavement again. “Let’s go,” he says, and Yuuri follows him this time to the same park from earlier.

This time Yuuri tries to run back to the hotel after peeing, but Viktor catches him again and tells him in no uncertain terms that he would rather not have to explain any doggy messes to the hotel staff. Yuuri is sulkily scoping out a patch of grass to do his business in when Viktor’s phone buzzes with a text.

Viktor glances up at Yuuri, who is studiously ignoring him, and carefully starts to reply.

He gnaws on his upper lip and looks at Yuuri again. Yuuri is now staring at him.

“You done?” Viktor asks, and Yuuri looks away. Viktor sighs and carefully picks his way over to the spot Yuuri is now pretending does not exist, and his phone buzzes a few more times.

Viktor sighs.

He shoves his phone into his pocket so he can clean up after his skater.

 

“There’s nothing to be ashamed of,” Viktor mutters as he steps into the elevator with Yuuri ensconced under his coat, safely against his chest. “Really.”

Yuuri huffs against his neck, but ducks his head down as the elevator comes to a stop a few floors before theirs and a few people step on.

They’d missed most of the practice session. He is starting to feel vaguely nervous. Not the kind of nerves that used to hit him before competitions when he was young, but the kind of nerves that came from anticipating the worst.

They make it back to the room without any fuss, and Yuuri immediately hides under his bed. Viktor lets him, this time. He has to get a grip on his rising panic.

Yuuri had spent close to four months as a dog previously. He had, when telling Viktor about his experiences, mentioned the strange episodes where his human personality had started fading away. (Viktor sometimes had nightmares about scenarios where Yuuri never regained his human consciousness and come back as himself. He didn’t mention those. Ever.)

“Yuuri,” he says aloud, and it’s like his voice is coming from far away. “We can’t… we can’t afford to miss your free skate.”

Yuuri makes a muffled, high-pitched noise from under the bed.

Viktor buries his face in his hands and breathes through his nose. “Is it something you might have done?” he asks.

There’s no answer.

“Yuuri,” he tries again, getting on his hands and knees so he can peer under the bed.

Yuuri refuses to look at him, curled tightly in a little furry ball, wedged up against the wall. He’s shaking again.

“Yuuri, please come here so I can help you?”

Yuuri ignores him - or maybe he can’t hear Viktor anymore, if he’s descending into a panic attack. Viktor heaves a deep breath and flattens himself onto the floor, working his torso under the bed so he can reach out and just barely touch the little ball of fur and anxiety, mere centimeters out of his grasp.

Yuuri jerks in surprise and stares at him.

“Yuuri, I can’t help you if you don’t let me,” Viktor says softly, putting all of his earnestness into the words.

Yuuri blinks twice and slowly uncurls, edging closer to his fingers, before shuffling towards Viktor at long last. He lets Viktor pull him out completely and flops down next to him, sighing.

“Same,” Viktor says, and Yuuri makes a surprised huffing noise that Viktor thinks might be a laugh. “But you broke the curse before. That means it can be done again. We just need to figure out how.”

Yuuri just sighs again, and Viktor rolls onto his back, his tall frame cramped between the two beds.

On the nightstand, Yuuri’s phone buzzes. Viktor glances at Yuuri questioningly, and Yuuri nods, giving him permission to answer for him.

Viktor snatches up the phone and swipes to answer before the call can go to voicemail.

“Viktor!” Minako says, and she sounds concerned. “I didn’t see Yuuri at practice today! Is he all right?”

“Ah,” Viktor answers, eyeing Yuuri below him. “Yes. He’s just laying down for a bit, getting himself ready to compete.”

Yuuri rolls his eyes at Viktor, who responds with an exasperated look. _What else am I supposed to say?_ he mouths as Minako continues to talk.

“I know everyone at home called last night after the short programme,” she’s saying as Viktor refocuses on the conversation. “I just… I was hoping to see him before the free skate today, tell him I’m proud of him too and all--”

“Of course I will, I’m sure he already knows,” Viktor replies, fiddling with his sleeve. “I’ll be sure to tell him.”

“You’re sure he’s alright?” Minako presses.

“Absolutely.”

“He’s not going to… he’s not going to disappear on us again, is he?” she asks, and Viktor can hear the very real fear in her voice.

“Absolutely not,” he says, and he means it. Not if he has anything to say about it.

“Okay.” Minako still sounds worried, so Viktor takes another few minutes to reassure her before hanging up and collapsing with a sigh against the bed. “Minako just wanted to tell you good luck,” he tells Yuuri, who whines. “Did you hear from your family last night?”

Yuuri nods, his entire posture drooping.

“She wants you to know that everyone is proud of you,” Viktor adds, and Yuuri doesn’t respond. “Yuuri, there’s no pressure from anyone that cares about you.”

Yuuri shakes his head, and Viktor bites his lip. _Okay, so it’s not that._

“Maybe we should… try…” Viktor flounders for the words he wants in English. “...thinking. Thinking in your mind about turning back. Picturing it? With your mind?”

Yuuri gives him a weird look, and Viktor shrugs helplessly. “I’m sure you’ve already tried it, but maybe you can try a different way?”

Yuuri rolls his eyes again, but then lowers his head and appears to concentrate for a few minutes. Those minutes seem to last for an eternity, and Viktor is starting to feel sick when nothing happens.

Yuuri gives up with a frustrated noise and refuses to look Viktor in the face, even as Viktor tries to reassure him that it’ll work out. Eventually, he retreats back under the bed, and Viktor doesn’t even bother trying to coax him back out.

“I’m going out,” Viktor says flatly after a few minutes, getting to his feet and grabbing his coat again. He hears no response from Yuuri and lets himself out into the hotel hallway, making his way to the elevator.

 

He’s walking aimlessly around Beijing when his phone buzzes. He’s surprised to check it and find that Yakov is calling him.

He answers it, and Yakov doesn’t even give him the chance to speak. “Where the hell are you and Katsuki?” his former coach demands, and Viktor can practically hear the vein popping on the man’s forehead.

Viktor has to search for an answer, and then sighs. “We’re having issues,” he admits. “Just like you said. You were right, are you happy to hear that?”

“For the love of God, Viktor,” Yakov groaned. “Do you think I enjoy being right about this?”

“I don’t know,” Viktor snaps. “You seemed willing to question my every move thus far!”

Yakov makes an aggravated noise and the connection fizzles until Viktor moves out of the shadow of a building, just in time to hear the old coach say “...you to be wasting your time!”

“I’m _not_ wasting my time,” Viktor says coldly. “Yuuri is more than capable of getting into the Grand Prix Finale again and taking gold. I just need him to see that!”

“Yes, but are you the right coach to make him see it?” Yakov asks, cutting through Viktor’s indignation.

Viktor is stunned, so stunned that he can’t make a comeback. He hangs up without even signing off. His phone goes into Do Not Disturb mode and slides back into his pocket.

He walks aimlessly for a bit before the sound suddenly comes back into the world and he’s _mad_.

It’s not how Viktor usually reacts to being confronted with something that makes him unhappy. He’s not allowed to be angry, he’s the pride of his country and one of the top figures in his sport, even if he’s not competing anymore. Still, the sudden hot anger flooding through him is almost cathartic, a joy in a way. It’s decadent, and Viktor revels in it.

Sure, he’s not that great of a coach, but it’s literally the first time he’s ever tried. And besides, Yuuri chose him. Yuuri asked him at the banquet and agreed when Viktor told him after he’d forgotten.

And Yuuri had found success, he’s got a long way to go, but he’s made strides to truly fulfilling his potential. Sure, any coach out there could have worked with Yuuri to build his free skate. Any coach could have decided to give him a short programme out of his comfort zone. But _Viktor_ is the one who did it. _Viktor_ is the one who pushed Yuuri into finding his Eros, after reminding him that he’d done it before. _Viktor_ is the one who inspired Yuuri to reconnect with his classmate from Detroit and completely retool the _Yuri On Ice_ song.

Celestino had always given Yuuri programmes that played to his strengths but didn’t venture into unknown territory that could have allowed him to grow as a performer. Celestino had gotten Yuuri to a plateau and hadn’t been able to handle his death spiral last December. And Viktor is _not_ going to lose this wonderful, talented, potential champion to the noise in his own head. Not again.

Viktor had wondered what Yuuri wanted him to be, and Yuuri had told him to be himself. Viktor had wondered which Viktor Yuuri wanted - did Yuuri want Viktor the five-time World Champion and Olympic gold medalist? Or did Yuuri want the man who had taken in a homeless poodle, and was sometimes a wreck in private?

Now, Viktor realizes that it doesn’t matter which version of himself that Yuuri wanted. Yuuri was going to get a retired athlete that had set many world records and won many medals, but was also on medication and occasionally doubted himself in this new role that he’d jumped into without any previous experience. If that wasn’t good enough, Yuuri is free to leave him for a new coach. Viktor would be lying if he said that possibility wouldn’t hurt, but it wasn’t ultimately up to him.

Skaters have fragile hearts, this he’s _very_ well aware of. And now that he thinks of it, maybe it’s time he takes what he knows about being a skater and puts it to use on someone other than himself.

 

Viktor strides into their room with a shout of “Yuuri!” but his skater isn’t immediately visible. Viktor doesn’t even shed his coat, getting down on his hands and knees to check under the beds.

No Yuuri.

He’d left the “do not disturb” placard on the door when he’d left before, and the room had been left untouched. Viktor first checks Yuuri’s bed, and then on a hunch pulls apart his own.

Yuuri is curled up under Viktor’s covers and blinks balefully at him when he’s exposed.

“Yuuri, this is _enough_ ,” Viktor says, allowing his frustration to bleed through into his tone.

Yuuri goes very still, eyes wide. He reminds Viktor of Makkachin when he catches her doing something she knows she shouldn’t. Viktor refuses to let that distract him, soften his focus.

“We need to go, the competition is starting soon. You have _got_ to get a grip.”

Yuuri lets out a high-pitched noise, but Viktor doesn’t let up.

“No, don’t give me that,” he says sternly. “You’ve had enough time to wallow. You broke the curse before. Or is your place not out on the ice anymore?”

Yuuri stares at him, and Viktor can see the impact his words are having.

“Here I thought you wanted this,” Viktor goes on. “I thought you wanted me to coach you. Am I really that terrible of a coach that you would give up on the GPF?” He turns away, takes a breath. “Well, if you can’t… if you can’t do this, fine. We can forfeit this, and I’ll take you home to your family. I’ll take full responsibility and resign as your coach.”

Maybe being home and surrounded by his loved ones would be enough for Yuuri to find his way back to himself again if Viktor himself wasn’t enough. The thought hurt, but… but Viktor was trying not to be selfish anymore.

“How can you just say that?”

Viktor jolts in shock and whirls around.

Yuuri is kneeling on Viktor’s bed, human once more, still in his sleep clothes. Viktor hadn’t heard a sound, not a single indication of anything happening behind him. He rubs his eyes, but Yuuri’s still there, his eyes wide and shining with tears that start spilling down his cheeks.

“Is this some kind of _test_?” Yuuri demands, his voice rising in pitch. “Why would you say that?!”

“Yuuri, I didn’t mean it--” Viktor hurries to reassure the crying skater, falling to his knees in front of him. “I wasn’t being serious--”

“You know, I’m used to being at fault,” Yuuri sobs, turning away. His shoulders shake. “I’m used to being blamed for my own failures. But this time… this time is different because it’s _you_.”

Viktor is shocked speechless for the second time that day.

“What part of _if I do badly, it reflects on you_ do you not get?” Yuuri grits out, and he’s working himself into hysterics. Viktor has no idea how to handle this now. “I’m scared that you secretly want to quit!”

Viktor breathes in sharply. “Of course I don’t want to--”

“ _I know!_ ”

Viktor’s mouth snaps shut as Yuuri finally looks at him again. His eyes are bright and shining with fervor, and his fists are clenched in his lap.

Viktor sits back on his heels, completely at a loss. “I’m terrible with crying people,” he admits at last. “Do you want me to… kiss you or something?”

“ _No_ ,” Yuuri snaps. “Just have more faith in me than I do! Just _stay_ with me!” He wipes at his face, his hands shaking. “You don’t have to say anything,” he repeats. “Just stand by me.”

They sit in silence for a bit as Yuuri calms down, and then he pushes himself off of Viktor’s bed and strips off his shirt. Viktor watches, dumbfounded, as he disappears into the bathroom.

_What the hell just happened?_

 

They make it to the arena just in time to see Phichit’s skate. Yuuri warms up in the back while Viktor’s attention is divided between his skater and the other competitors. Leo de la Iglesia skates, and then Georgi, and both fall below Phichit and Christophe in the ranks.

Viktor had been keeping track of the competition as Yuuri had toweled his hair dry and slicked it back, and then during the ride in the taxi. Now, as he takes Yuuri’s skate guards while Georgi slinks out of the kiss-and-cry behind Yakov, he reflects that he’s really out of his depth. He should have asked Yakov for advice while on the phone with his old coach.

Yuuri nudges at his arm and takes a tissue from the Makkachin tissue case, and daintily blows his nose before balling it up and holding it out to Viktor. But then he drops it and forces Viktor to chase after it.

Viktor catches the tissue and is shocked when he feels a finger poking at his scalp. _Yuuri?_

His skater pats him before pushing off the wall and skating away, leaving Viktor staring after him with a gobsmacked look on his face.

 _I suppose I deserve that,_ he thinks, then blinks. _Why is he smiling?_

And then the music begins.

 

In the end, Yuuri doesn’t land his surprise quad flip. It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter at all.

 _It’s the thought that counts,_ Viktor thinks as he buries his face in his hands so he can get a grip on himself. And that’s when he realizes what everything means.

And really, Yuuri shouldn’t be so shocked when Viktor kisses him. After all, Viktor can still surprise him too.

Yuuri beams up at him from the ice, his eyes shining with something soft. Viktor previously could barely bring himself to hope, but he doesn’t need to content himself with just hope anymore. Yuuri didn’t have to do Viktor’s signature move at the end of a routine that was meant to tell the story of his life as a skater. But he _had_ done it.

Viktor’s not an idiot. Yuuri’s giving him a precious gift, and he’s greedy enough to take it with both hands, hold it tightly to his chest.

The feeling doesn’t fade, as Yuuri receives his silver medal and Viktor tells the press - in a thinly-veiled brag, because that’s _his_ skater shocking the world - that he’s excited to return to Russia as a coach, that he’s confident Yuuri will win the Rostelecom Cup, that there will be more quad flips in his future. The energy between them feels different - familiar, but more intense. Yuuri can’t stop leaning against him during the taxi ride back to the hotel, and Viktor doesn’t think he can possibly ever feel happier than this moment now.

 

[ _some time post-series_ ]

 

The day of the wedding, Viktor is having breakfast in the Yu-topia dining room when Phichit skids into the room, looking frantic.

“What’s the matter?” he asks as the Thai skater pants, slumping in front of the table and trying to catch his breath.

Phichit coughs and looks up. “I can’t find Yuuri anywhere,” he gasps. “No one’s seen him. I have Best Man duties, and I _can’t find him anywhere_.”

Viktor blinks and then sighs. “I know where he went.” He pushes his breakfast away and motions for Phichit to settle down. “Just hang tight. I’ll be right back.”

He lets himself into his and Yuuri’s shared bedroom and sighs. “Rise and shine, sleeping beauty,” he says to the seemingly empty bed. The pillows quiver. “Today is the first day of the rest of our lives, my love,” he says in a sing-song voice, tearing away the covers and the pillows.

Yuuri shrinks away, little poodle tail tucked between his legs, but he’s done this so many times since that fateful Cup of China that Viktor isn’t even phased anymore. He scoops up his fiancé-turned-toy-poodle and cuddles him to his chest.

“Do you honestly think I’m going to suddenly change my mind?” he asks Yuuri, who gazes up at him with an unreadable expression.

Yuuri hesitates, then shakes his head.

“Are you going to change _your_ mind?” Viktor presses, and Yuuri’s head shake is much more emphatic. “Well then, there’s nothing to be worried about. This is a happy day. Plus…” he waggled his eyebrows. “Just think of the honeymoon.”

Yuuri goes completely still, and Viktor drops a kiss on his forehead and deposits him on the bed. “Mama Hiroko made breakfast. Come eat so Phichit can do his Best Man duties on you,” he says as he lets himself out.

Viktor resettles himself back at the breakfast table, and less than ten minutes later Yuuri stumbles in, red-faced, and sinks down next to him. “Thanks,” his fiancé mutters into Viktor’s neck.

Viktor beams. “No problem, my love.”

 

**FIN.**

**Author's Note:**

> Note, please just imagine Yuuri having literal dog days and spending them cuddling his husband until he feels better. :D
> 
> EDIT: The *actual* next fic in this series is a roles reversal! (There's a bit of angst, but you guys should know me by now!) The final fic will cover the alternate endings. If you don't want to be sad, feel free to skip them. If you want to read something fun and happy, check out my other fic "Saltwater Melodies" in which Viktor, Mila, and Yurio get turned into H2O: Just Add Water -style merkids!
> 
> Come talk to me at [Tumblr](http://linneakou.tumblr.com) and [Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/linneakou)!!


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